Category: PUNS! (page 10)

• What do you call it when a prostitute falls over while square dancing?
• A ho down!

Rich Laguna

Here's to the French. à votre santé!

Rich Laguna

I asked a man why he had electric guitars fastened to his car near the tires. He said because they're his Fenders!

Rich Laguna

 

• Why was the un-baked cake so good at baseball?
• He was a good batter!

Rich Laguna

While golfing, Fay hit the required number of strokes for all 18 holes. When she got back to the clubhouse, they had a table waiting for her with a free desert. It was a lovely treat with layers of cream, fruit and cake served in a tall glass. The waitress approached with a spoon and said, "This is for your par, Fay."

Rich Laguna

• Why wasn't the sardine working?
• He got canned!

Rich Laguna

I like espresso a little, but when I add steamed milk, I like it a latte!

Rich Laguna

• What do gorillas wear when cooking?
• APE-rons!

When I plugged in my new TV, the screen displayed some text that read:

• Verb - Of great vertical extant
• Noun - A high point, level or figure
• Adverb - At or to a considerable or specified height.

I guess that's what I get for buying a high-definition television.

Rich Laguna

Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher? She couldn't control her pupils.

Rich Laguna

• This is my first joke: I want to do a toilet joke, but I'm pooped.
• Here is my second joke: The toilet's face was red because he was flushed.
• And finally, this is my turd joke!

Rich Laguna

• What kind of beer should you drink on National Adoption Day?
• Foster's

Rich Laguna

The farmer kept his boat in the large red building in his back lot. But when he went to get the boat, the bottom was covered in five cent pieces. Yeah, the boat had Barn Nickles!

Rich Laguna

17 year old Nicolas could not by cigarettes because Nick a teen!

Rich Laguna

• What kind of crackers to writers enjoy most?
• GRAMMAR Crackers!

Rich Laguna

I used my computer to write about Diabetes. I needed a copy to keep and one for my doctor. My printer wasn't working so I had to type 2.

Rich Laguna

Joe and Holly are both comedians, but would either consider acting? Not Joe, but Holly would!

Rich Laguna

• Doctor - "Well? Do you have information on your pneumonia?"
• Patient - "Yes, but..."
• Doctor - "Come on, cough it up!"

Rich Laguna

I wasn't going to do a pun about Origami, but then I folded.

Rich Laguna

Of course it's National Accounting Day. It all adds up!

Rich Laguna